The point where I envy the dead and gone..
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To my husband on our wedding anniversary, tonight was our 13th year. I say this as if you are still here because the memories invade my days and sleep does not give me respite.Yes it is hard and every day is painful as there are reminders in everything I do from opening a drawer, walking through the grocery store or sitting in the dentist chair. I am still expected to do these tasks the every day mundane pay the bills kind of thing. And I do them, forcing myself to get out of bed when all I want to do is stay under the covers, ignoring the world. But I don’t get to because I choose to stay here, to live, and with that to figure out how to be ok, how to navigate the feelings I have. I know I will be able to because of the amazing family…
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