“But no one has the right to judge your perception of the difference between right and wrong.
It is true that we must not judge people harshly for being who they are but there are right and
wrong actions and not judging people who choose to harm other people places all of us at risk.”
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A matured mind with serious precision.
From what I know about your Mother I can understand how you might stumble into relationships that feel deceptive and controlling.
That you have survived to be as loving as you are attests to your strength of will and natural gift for seeing through fakes.
You will have to fight for the stability that many people mistakenly assume is the result of thinking the “right thoughts.”
The compulsion to replicate an abusive relationship is a challenge that adults who were abused as children must understand and overcome.
You want to make it right with your Mother, but she is gone; so you look for her in other people.
The shadows you describe are a good sign, because it means that you can see the replication before it is complete.
Your ability to see that you are in danger means…
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